Day 102. The Smiling Daffodil almost went up in flames…until she employed some Dale Carnegie principles….

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 102.  Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Everyone was on my last nerve today. 

I tried. I took a deep breath. I prayed. I listened to my favorite song again and again. I prayed some more. I immersed myself in my work.  And something must’ve worked.  Picture Niagara Falls turning into a tranquil, peaceful lake.  I was calm.

Don't be fooled by the calm... I see dark clouds coming!

Until the next set of interruptions….

“Smiling Daffodil, when is this event? What prize is next week? I need all the paperwork for XYZ by this Friday. I also don’t want any last minute requests from you Smiling Daffodil— I have a very busy month in August.” – said, several associates.

I’m a horrible person—because my thought process went like this:  It’s not about what you want.  Speak in terms of what interests me, silly!  Surely you have heard of Dale Carnegie. Use it on me! (I did not say these words out loud)

Disclaimer:  My reaction did not follow the Carnegie rules.   To paraphrase Abraham Lincoln, people are who they are.  We would be the same if we were in their circumstances.  Plus Dale Carnegie said we can’t expect people to change.  All we can do is change ourselves.

Just light a match and the office would have exploded because of my frustration.

I tried to calm down.  I prayed. I felt my heart pounding.  I think my face was red.  I repeated one of my favorite Dale Carnegie principles—expect ingratitude. Expect ingratitude.  EXPECT INGRATITUDE!

I even repeated just one line from the “Our Father” prayer:  “give us this day, our daily bread.”  I reminded myself that I should be grateful for my daily bread.  (also known as burritos and Starbucks).  I shouldn’t complain I don’t have a giant warehouse of food/money.  I have enough to sustain me.  There are people that would gladly take my job and not utter one complaint. 

I decided to immerse myself in my work… because frankly I was enjoying my work.  Today I was working on one of the greatest contests in the history of contests. (my opinion of course!)  Just thinking about it shifted my focus from irritation to happiness….

This blog will be a bit unconventional. I’d like to tell you that once I focused on working on my contest that my workday ended with roses, rainbows and butterflies.  But I’m a very stubborn individual.  I might have a small frame but I tend to behave like an immovable mountain.

I continued to pray on the drive home.  I even sang my heart out while being stuck in traffic on the highway.  I did my best to pull myself out of my box of frustration—telling myself that tomorrow will be better. There are ups and downs to life. 

I got home, ate my burritos and have since calmed down from a very long day at work.  I am not really certain if I can claim I succeeded at applying Dale Carnegie principles.  What I do know—thank God I have the Dale Carnegie principles to lean on when I have frustrating days at work or in life in general.  Bad days do happen—it’s just part of life—but having the right tools to make these days a little easier is quite a blessing. 

I am a stickler for following the rules to my own blog—so let’s pin me down on some principles I employed:

From Dale Carnegie’s book, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Pray.
Do the best you can.
Analyze your own mistakes and criticize yourself.

I do think I did the best I could dealing with the 101 interruptions/requests today.  Unfortunately I fell a bit short… well maybe a lot short.  With more practice I might be able to handle these types of days a little better.  (I aim for incremental improvement—it’s an easier pill to swallow). 

If nothing else—I am profiting from my losses by sharing my struggles and how I deal with them with you my readers.  You’ll either think I’m nuts and find humor in it—or perhaps it will give you some perspective on areas in your life that you can appreciate more or even improve on. 

I am certain that we all have that tipping point where the day just goes from bad to worse.  Know that you are not alone in that experience.  Know that it is worth trying the techniques I used—prayer, doing the best you can, analyzing your own mistakes.  When you do this—your emotions and thoughts take a different, more constructive path.  I knew I was irritated—but I was also doing my best to find a creative and constructive way to calm myself down so that I would not lash out on anyone.  It took me awhile—but here I am… a nice, tranquil, peaceful pond… until tomorrow. Ha!

Housekeeping / Notes
Thank you everyone for reading my blog.  A special note of thanks to “Michelin Man’s Mom” I had no idea you were reading.  I am thrilled.  😉

Day 92. Step one– get all the facts before jumping to conclusions. Step two– repeat step one….

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 92.  Sunday, June 26, 2011
I woke up to the sound of a weed whacker.  Although I only had 4 ½ hours of sleep I was wide awake.  My neighbor must be using Dale Carnegie’s principle to subtly give me a hint that my backyard is a disaster. 

I decided I better get up and face the jungle that is my backyard.  I have a feeling my jungle is encroaching on my neighbor’s backyard.  A few years ago I decided to treat myself to the most amazing plant I’ve ever seen.  It’s called a Passion Flower vine—and it’s true to its name. 

Out of control

It grows with such passion and enthusiasm…. in the middle of my lawn…. in my neighbor’s backyard…. everywhere. 

Passion flower

The blooms, the fragrance and the butterflies are the tradeoff for the enthusiastic takeover of my backyard.  I just can’t bring myself to get rid of the vine.  But I must admit by the time it’s summer I give up on the vine and count the days for the first frost so that nature can destroy it for the season. 

I went outside to deal with the jungle.  Except now I didn’t hear any weed whackers, lawnmowers or any signs of life in the neighborhood.  I assumed the worst—that my neighbors were irritated with me.  But I was mistaken. 

I figured since I was up I might as well do my best to trim the vine.  By the time I was finished cutting it away I was drenched—it gets rather hot during the summers in Texas.  I was too late to attend church in the morning so I planned on going in the evening.

I got cleaned up and went to the nail salon.  I was getting my nails done—in my favorite deep dark purple color when I felt myself turning white as a ghost.  I was on the verge of passing out. 

My first thought, “Lord, is this punishment for not going to church in the morning?  I’m going to go in the evening.  I won’t skip Mass.  There have only been two documented cases of me not going to church—once when I was a sick as a kid and the other time when I was recovering from my wisdom teeth being removed.”

I hoped God believed my sincerity that I’d follow through and go in the evening.  First the rebellious dark nail polish, now church in the evening… what’s next? 

Well, the woman painting my nails must have noticed me turning white.  She offered me water and asked, “Smiling Daffodil, have you eaten?”

The thought had not occurred to me.  “No… I haven’t.  That’s probably it.”

I reviewed the facts: 
– Heavy yard work this morning in the very hot sun
– Lack of sleep
– An intense workout at the gym around midnight
– My last meal sometime around 9 pm the night before

Yes…odds are these factors were causing my light-headedness today.

She brought me water and I did my best to stay calm.  I think the smell of the nail polish kept me from passing out. 

My nails were complete and I drove home amused.  Clearly, for all my efforts to use the Dale Carnegie principles I continue to assume the worst and let the worst get the best of me.  I assumed my neighbors were up in arms with my jungle-style backyard.  I assumed God was punishing me for going to evening Mass instead of morning Mass.  Looking back, I am the cause of undo stress!

The principle I am slow to use is from Dale Carnegie’s How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Get all the facts.

Learn from my mistakes.  When you are faced with worry, doubt or a decision you must make—get all the facts first.  When you take this approach you’re in a better position to face your troubles more objectively and with a sound mind. 

Addition
Within an hour of me writing this piece—I was texting an associate from work.  It was a positive conversation.  But then out of nowhere he sent a frowning emoticon 😦  I wondered why he did this.  Then my thoughts went back to a marketing campaign I did that bombed.  Oh man.  That sad emoticon he sent is the result of my failure on the campaign.  My thoughts then went to tomorrow—Monday…and the possibility of being called into a meeting to discuss the failure.  It was at this point I did my best to pull myself out of my spiraling downturn of thoughts.  I reminded myself I did my best on the campaign.  We all did our best. 

At this point it was time to go to evening Mass.  I checked my phone and there was a text message.  My associate responded back—“oops—I didn’t mean to send a frown emoticon.  I meant a smiley face.” 

That’s when I thought—geesh.  When will I learn!

Housekeeping / Notes:
Today is the perfect day to catch up on past blogs you have missed. Click here for the Archives section.

Day 88. Let the other person save face.

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 88.  Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Today I was reviewing the task list and noticed that “Bob” a contract employee had not submitted his work.  Although he has known about the assignment for at least a month and a half he missed the deadline.  He didn’t even contact me to let me know there was a problem or that the assignment would be turned in late.  Nothing! 

I knew this was an opportunity for a particular Dale Carnegie principle that I’m not very good at using.  So I decided to send Bob an email:

Hi Bob,
I wanted to check in with you and see how you are coming along on the XYZ project.  I can’t wait to see it.  Send me an email when you get a chance.   

Sincerely,
Smiling Daffodil. 

——
I heard from Bob right away:

“Dear Smiling Daffodil,
I am ashamed to say I didn’t complete the task.  I’ve been burdened trying to figure out how to complete it.  I feel really bad about it—it’s not my best work.  I have attached a preview of what I have done so far—tell me the truth—if you think I should throw it away and start over let me know.

Very sincerely,
Bob-who-didn’t-complete-his-task-and-feels-bad-about-being-the-difficult-contract-employee”

——
Well—how could I not smile with such a funny and overly dramatic email from Bob? 

He offered some other details about why he was having a hard time with the assignment.  Having this information served two purposes.  I was able to get all the facts before jumping to the wrong conclusion that Bob was just a careless, irresponsible employee.  And I was able to give Bob some encouragement and the opportunity to save face.

My response to Bob:
Dear Bob,
I am sorry you struggled with this assignment!  I reviewed what you sent and so far it looks great!  Yes, please go ahead and complete the assignment—but work at your own pace and once you are finished I will find make sure we use your work.

Sincerely,
Smiling Daffodil

I also volunteered some tips by pointing to my own challenges and struggles with similar projects. 

Bob responded and expressed great relief and appreciation for the tips.  He also told me he will finish the task and submit his work by the end of the week.

The Dale Carnegie principles I used in this story are from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Get all the facts.
Let the other person save face.

Let the other person save face

I chose not to send a frustrated or angry email to Bob explaining how his delay has caused challenges for me.  Bob has his own concerns—he probably doesn’t care about mine.  So I decided to get all the facts before making assumptions.  When I did this—I was able to learn that Bob was discouraged with his work and I was able to give him the encouragement he needed to complete the assignment.

So remember, while it is easy to jump to conclusions—don’t.  Get all the facts first.  Treat individuals with respect and don’t belittle them as you get all the facts.  When you do this you will discover ways to give them the encouragement they need to willingly complete their work. 

Housekeeping / Notes:

• In light of today’s blog topic I feel the need to confess.  My posts are technically a day off.  I’m a night owl—by the time I write my blog about the day’s events it’s technically the next morning—usually 1 or 2 am.  Let’s just continue to go with my delusions.  In my world I make my deadlines….
• With that said, Wednesday marks an important day for a very special guest blogger.  I’m so excited to share the story and technically it’s ready to be posted…. but I’m going to make everyone wait until Wednesday evening.  So do your evening routine, have dinner, etc and then tune in for a very high quality story from a friend and role model.  I am certain his story will impact you. 

Thank you everyone!

Day 86. In retrospect, my gift was more like a macaroni art project….

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 86.  Sunday, June 19, 2011
I was up late on Saturday.  I was frantic because I wasn’t certain I had a sewing needle in the house.  I can’t give an unfinished pillow as a gift with the stuffing falling out….

I painstakingly stitched the pillow closed—hoping no one would notice the imperfections with the crooked stitches.  I wrapped the finished pillow in tissue paper and was actually glad I took the time to make a gift instead of buy a gift card.

The colors for the pillow were chosen for a reason.  They had an Asian flair to them. 

I pride myself in my marketing skills.  But I failed at this task completely.  I presented the gift to the recipient and I think he was either embarrassed, puzzled or didn’t like it.  He thanked me.  I replied, “I made it.”  “Yes, I can see that.”

Some see food, others see art project. It's all about perspective....

In retrospect I should have thought about what is important to this person.  His likes, his preferences, his interests—instead of thinking he’d like a homemade pillow.  I felt dejected—thinking my pillow was the equivalent of a child’s macaroni art project. 

I was at a very important crossroad in my mind.  I decided to take a very sharp turn and create happiness for others instead of dwelling on everything that went wrong with this day. 

I remembered Walter—he’s divorced, his kids are grown and odds are he’s alone today.  I sent him a text message wishing him a Happy Father’s Day.  To my surprise, he immediately texted me back thanking me.

This was balm for my wounds.  So I sent another text—this time to Alejandro.  Alejandro has a stepson.  Every year that he’s been married I have wished him a Happy Father’s Day.  I am the only one in his life that wishes him a Happy Father’s Day.  He too responded back immediately—thanking me and pointing out yet again that I never fail at remembering year after year.

Last, I sent a text to another friend—Mustafa.  He’s divorced and has a little girl.  I’m always touched by his Facebook wall posts about his weekends with his daughter.  You can really see that he loves his daughter.  He also responded immediately.

For my final mental trick—I was leaving my home when I noticed my neighbors were packing their suburban.  The last time I saw my neighbor she was pregnant.  (You might remember the “Ode to the Rotting Fish story”)   Well, she has since had her baby—and I could see the baby seat in the car.  I rolled down my window and smiled.  Then I got out of my car and excitedly went to see the new baby.  I wished her husband a Happy Father’s Day. 

I’d like to say this day was a piece of cake.  I’d like to say that it’s easy to implement the Dale Carnegie principles every single day.  Some days are a real challenge.  However, through the entire process I was aware I had the tools I needed to get through the day.  I also have black and white proof—85 days to be exact—of implementing the principles. 

It is true I should have been more aware of the person’s interests when choosing a gift—and perhaps I could have marketed the homemade pillow better—pointing out the features and why it should be of interest or value. 

 On the bright side—as the day unfolded not as I planned—I knew I had potential for a good blog.  It was just up to me to figure out how to make lemonade from this day.  I knew I had to choose to make lemonade otherwise I’d have an unhappy day.

The Dale Carnegie principles I used today are from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Create happiness for others.
Profit from your losses.
Keep busy.

From How to Win Friends and Influence People:
Principle 17.  Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.

I hope you find value to this story for the right reasons.  My main objective in sharing it is not for sympathy.  Understand that people are who they are—and they don’t always realize the effects of their actions.  I’m among those people more often than not.  Knowing what disappointment feels like—I realize the need to be more appreciative of others for what they do for me.  Remember this the next time you are met with disappointment and learn to change your own behavior before pointing the blame at everyone else. The only person you can change is yourself and how you deal with situations. 

Incidentally, I made two more heart pillows today for no other reason than to keep my mind busy for my own sake.  And let me tell you…. they are stunning.  I might have to go into the pillow business if my lemonade stand doesn’t last. 

Housekeeping / Notes

• Coming soon!  Two guest blog posts!  Two of my favorite gentlemen have stepped up to the challenge.  More information coming soon.
• Don’t forget—mi casa es su casa (my home is your home).  There is always room for a guest blogger at the Smiling Daffodil’s blog home.  All are welcome.  You don’t even need skills at writing.  Click for more information.
• It was a busy weekend.  In case you missed a post, click on the Pictorial/Archive section. Thank you for reading my blog. 

Day 84. I make lemonade for a living….

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 84.  Friday, June 17, 2011
It was noon and I had enough of the day.  I turned off my computer and I left the building.

I decided to take a lunch.  I never take lunches.  I have a light “snack” at Starbucks everyday instead of a lunch.  But today was not an ordinary day.  I had to get out of the building for a change of scenery.

I ended up at Wendy’s.  I stood in line for a minute and determined it wasn’t worth the wait in line.  I returned to my car and sat there a few moments and prayed.

“Dear God.  I need a place to eat.  I don’t want to eat but I need a change of perspective.  I’m trying to make lemonade out of this ridiculously horrible day.”

That’s when it hit me.  McDonald’s has a new strawberry lemonade.  Although I hate everything that has lemon flavor I do happen to like this drink.  Besides, what a great pun!

As I drove to McDonald’s I gave myself a pep talk. 

Smiling Daffodil’s Pep Talk:  “I determine my own happiness.  I manufacture genuine happiness each and every day.  I will not let people’s thoughtless behaviors or unreasonable demands affect the outcome of my day.  I will profit from my losses.  I will expect ingratitude.  I will figure out how to use their carelessness towards me to my advantage.  I have succeeded at this for 83 days.  Today will be no different.  People are who they are and they will not change.  All I can do to cope with this is to change myself and how I react to people.” 

I arrived at McDonald’s full of hope and an open mind.  I was determined to find something positive at McDonald’s to change my outlook on the day.  There were a lot of families with their children and the children were quite… rambunctious.  I found this distracting and entertaining. 

Atypical lunch for the Smiling Daffodil

I ate my meal and lived in the moment trying to think of Dale Carnegie principles that would help me deal with my frustrations from the silly people I work with.  I even sent an SOS for prayers from a friend.  I don’t like to do that often… but today was one of those days.

I don’t know how it happened.  Was it the strawberry lemonade?  Perhaps the homemade lemon decorations all over the restaurant? 

Somehow the lemon decorations were endearing to this weathered daffodil...

Maybe it was the friendly manager that apologized for the noise of all the children. 

Maybe it was my resolve to turn this day into a good blog.  Or it was the prayers on my behalf that were kicking in.    

I have no idea what caused the change of perspective.  But I found myself calm.  I was able to reflect on the day and I resolved to stay focused and do my best to get through it. 

You see—I had two projects that had to get finished TODAY.  I can’t go home / go to sleep / have my weekend / etc until these two tasks are done.  No exceptions.  Normally I just have one of these projects on Fridays.  But today was special.  I had two disastrous, stressful projects to complete. 

And to top it off—management had TONS of changes to one of the projects.  I did my best to smile as they gave me their changes.  But it was very hard.  I felt so helpless trying to figure out how I could spin time out of straw.  My eyes betrayed me again—but this time I knew my best bet was to remove myself from the building, take a deep breath and figure out how to solve the extreme workload. 

I returned and the work was still there waiting for me.  It was a big heap of chaos on my desk.  I decided to delegate what I could and I slowly chipped away at all the details.

Surprisingly, I got my work complete in a calm, professional manner.  I gave appreciation where it was due.  Without my assistant I would not have been able to complete one of the projects without staying very late. 

There’s an assortment of Dale Carnegie principles I used today.  From How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Pray.
Try to profit from your losses.
Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries.
Cooperate with the inevitable.

I knew there was no point in arguing or complaining about the absurd workload today.  I accepted the inevitable that I would have to work a very long, tedious and mentally draining day.  I reminded myself this is not the first time this has happened.  I have a successful track record of getting tedious projects finished.  I was also aware of my own impatience with absurd people—so I prayed and asked a friend for backup prayers.  In the end—everything worked out as things usually do. 

This is a long story but I hope it has value to you.  When you find yourself surrounded by very absurd people or circumstances and what’s worse—you’re the only one that can recognize the absurdity—these are the days that you really appreciate the value of living the Dale Carnegie principles.  These principles are not pie in the sky or overly optimistic and nauseating statements.  I have tested them.  They are real and they work.

Housekeeping / Notes:
If you missed a blog post or two this week, you are welcome to click on over to the Pictorial archive section.

Day 82. I had 8 blog topics to choose from… so what happened?

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

 Day 82.  Wednesday, June 15, 2011
This day was jam packed with opportunities to use Dale Carnegie principles. I had so much blog material I made notes throughout the day so I wouldn’t forget. I even bragged to my friend at work that I can’t keep up with production—business is booming with too many blogs to write.  By the end of the day I had eight blog topics to choose from—a new world record.  (Usually I have at least two stories to choose from)

Surprisingly, as I sat to write earlier this evening I was struggling.  I wrote two drafts just for one of the blog topics and neither draft was any good.  Too much chatter and details—you’d fall asleep with what I wrote! 

How can I have eight fabulous topics and not be able to write them well? That’s when I realized the problem.  It’s that pesky principle from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Rest before you get tired.

For once I was not worried about topics when I sat down to write.  Yet—my mind just couldn’t come up with anything coherent—despite having lived the day’s events. (it might have something to do with the fact that I was up until 3 am on Wednesday)

I have to keep reminding myself that rest is important—otherwise my efforts become futile.  This is not an easy task for me!  Even now as I type this I see it as a fake blog.  Yes, it’s 3:30 am.  But in my mind I can and should just dig my heels in deep and figure out how to write the best blog from the 8 topics I came up with.  Yet, I am also aware that I did try… and it didn’t work.   GRRRRRRR!

So remember, work actually does become easier with the proper amount of rest—both physical and mental rest.  Odds are I will struggle with this one for the entire duration of the blog….

I was discussing this challenge with a friend we will call the Tofu Fairy.  He said something very brave and very true about me.  I am stubborn.  Let’s hope that I can figure out how to harness my stubbornness in such a way that I do rest before I get tired and not feel like I have to apologize for it.

Day 81. If what they say is true then I better live up to their expectations….

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 81.  Tuesday, June 15, 2011
Preface: There are two separate scenarios that helped create one great day.

Part 1.
I walked in to my local coffee shop today and was greeted by “Stefano”. 

Stefano:  “Smiling Daffodil—you are creative and crafty—will you help me with this project?  There are some free Java Chip Frappuccinos in your future in exchange for your help.”

Surprisingly it wasn’t the free Java Chip Frappuccinos that caught my ear.  It was the perception Stefano had of me being creative and crafty.  Those adjectives aren’t normally used to describe me. 

“Of course I’ll help”, I replied.
—
Part 2.
This afternoon I sent an instant message to my coworker Seth.  

Smiling Daffodil:  “Seth, I realize there’s only one right answer to the question I’m going to ask you.  But I’m going to ask you anyway because I need the encouragement.  Should I try to make a project to help promote the new craft book?  The thing is—I doubt anyone will like what I create.  Is there any point in me trying?”

Seth:  “Smiling Daffodil—I think you should make the best “darn” pillow you can and not worry what anyone thinks.  I am certain our customers will like it.” 

So I stayed late at the office and I made the best pillow I could.  I doubted my sewing skills but I remembered Stefano from this morning who declared that I was crafty.  I remembered Seth who said our customers will like what I create.  I considered past successes I have had—from oddball photos for my blog to embroidered bibs to various marketing copy I have written. 

I am fully aware that when I put enthusiasm into a task—my heart goes into it and the outcome is generally good. So I continued to sew and piece together my project.

Blooming with confidence

The end result this evening—an original Smiling Daffodil creation:  a 3-dimensional floral lattice pillow.  This pillow will generate interest and create sales for a new book.  More importantly for me, it symbolizes a renewed confidence in my ability to create—to be crafty.  

The Dale Carnegie principle I used today is from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living: 
Do the very best you can.

I know what it is like to be discouraged and not receive the support you need from those that are in a position to give it to you.  But you must be true to yourself.  You must do the very best you can.  You have the choice to let people hold you back… or not. 

All I wanted for the last two months was to experiment with a new product—but I was waiting for an invitation that never came.  What I forgot was—I fuel my own enthusiasm.  I write my own invitations.  I determine my goals.  If I can envision a 3-d pillow then odds are I will figure out how to make it happen.  I needed Stefano and Seth to remind me of these things.

When you are true to yourself and you do the very best you can—you create your happiness and no one can diminish it.   

It is also worth noting that Stefano and Seth used one of Dale Carnegie’s principles from How to Win Friends and Influence People:
Principle 28.  Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to. 

– Thank you Stefano and Seth. 

Day 80. My interpretation of Dale Carnegie’s principle: “Do the very best you can”

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 80.  Monday, June 13, 2011
I went to bed early on Sunday night.  I had a big day ahead of me.  I couldn’t sleep—I prayed Monday would go well.  What am I getting myself into having dinner with a friend whom I haven’t seen in years?  She’s made a remarkable life for herself.  And me?  How will this reunion turn out? 

Then I woke up stressed this morning.  What do I wear?  My favorite jeans are too faded and I can’t find a decent pair of shoes. 

I reminded myself that I am who I am and odds are my friend is exactly as I remember her.  That’s the reason I agreed to meet with her after all these years anyway. 

I left work at 5 pm to make my 6:45 pm dinner.  I underestimated rush hour traffic.  I had hoped to go home and freshen up but realized there wasn’t time. 

It was 100 degrees today.  I was a hot, sticky, oily mess.  What is this friend of mine going to think of me?  After all these years… and I still look like this?  To save time I went to Target to pick up some makeup and a face wash.  I scrubbed my face so hard it was red and the blemishes were bleeding.  ARGH.

I applied the newly purchased makeup.  It was for someone with fairer skin than mine.  I looked white as a ghost when I applied the makeup.  ARGH.

I was running out of time and now look at me… and now I might be late for dinner. I should have just gone home to freshen up instead….

I made it to the restaurant, patted down my messy hairdo and consoled myself—this is as good as it gets.  I am who I am.  I carried my humble plastic container with homemade cookies into the restaurant—not really sure if cookies are appropriate. 

What caption could possibly fit this photo? Fresh out of dignity!

When my friend walked in—all my absurd fears and concerns vanished.  She was the same person I remembered from the 5^th grade.  We looked at each other, gave each other big smiles—and marveled at how we looked like our mothers. 

Our meals were served and frankly we could have eaten cardboard or dirt and I would have been happy.  The hours passed as if they were minutes as we talked and listened to each other’s stories. 

I had planned at least 2 other blog topics today but when I sat down to write the blogs they just weren’t captivating enough.  That’s when I realized the only story appropriate for today is the one of me finding my childhood friend. 

The Dale Carnegie principle I used today is from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Do the very best you can.

You might think this is an odd principle to attach to this story.  Let me explain.  I decided that doing the very best I can means being myself.

I wasn’t going to pretend to be something beyond my current station in life.  I work hard, I have a lot of passion for what I do—but my world isn’t anything particularly glamorous or prestigious. 

I didn’t get dressed up—not out of disregard for her—but really—I hate getting dressed up.  I was myself:  blemishes, messy hair, jeans, t-shirt and sneakers.  Judging by how quickly time passed with smiles, genuine conversation and laughter—we both did our very best by being ourselves… and it worked. 

So remember, quit trying to be someone you are not.  Be comfortable and proud of who you are.  When you take this approach you’ll find life is more fulfilling, people around you are far more interesting than you could ever imagine and the people worth knowing see beyond the superficial. 

 – Thank you ‘Lucilla’.

Day 79. It was 3 am and I destroyed my blog page….

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles 

Day 79.  Sunday, June 12, 2011
I thought I could easily update a page on my blog last night.  I’m not the most proficient with html coding but I can manage adequately for my needs… so I thought.

When I looked at the clock it was 3 am.  I had completely messed up an important page on my blog and despite all my efforts the page kept getting worse.  I was completely frustrated and baffled because the code wasn’t working in a logical manner.  I closed my laptop and went to bed.

Going to bed after 3 am is not the brightest thing to do—especially when you have to get up early.  I was pretty crabby and my head wasn’t feeling so well.  I felt absolutely drained. So I decided this was the perfect excuse for a nap.  A couple hours later I woke up refreshed with a clearer head. 

I sat down to tackle the monumental task of fixing my destroyed blog page.  I wasn’t looking forward to it—I anticipated more frustration. 

Surprisingly… I quickly found a solution that should have been obvious to me last night/this morning.  I quickly made the edits, tested the page and voila—my blog page is fixed.

The Dale Carnegie principle I eventually used is from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Rest before you get tired.

Sometimes it’s best to step away from a problem and rest your mind before trying to figure out a solution.  When you take this approach you’ll discover it’s a lot easier to find solution.

Housekeeping / Notes
Be sure to check the updated archives section.  Each day now has the title description to help you find your favorite blog listing.

Day 78. Baby bibs brought me a smile!

365 Days of Living the Dale Carnegie Principles

Day 78.  Saturday, June 11, 2011
A month ago I purchased a set of baby bibs I had planned to embroider and give to my friend Marcella who recently had a baby. 

I only got around to embroidering one.  Various other interests happened plus I got busy with work and the six bibs have been untouched on my desk. 

Today I was thumbing through some photos from my recent trip visiting Marcella.  I came upon a photo of the bib that I gave her.  I remembered her reaction when she received it.  She loved it. 

I decided to hit the sewing room and finish the project I started. But I wasn’t feeling very creative as I was designing the bibs.  The task felt more like an obligation than something fun.  The first couple of bibs turned out “ok”.  But as I got more involved in the task I felt more confident and more creative. 

Put enthusiasm into your work!

I started experimenting with interesting fonts, embroidery designs, fabrics and thread colors.  Before I knew it—the bibs were finished—and they look great. 

The Dale Carnegie principle I used is from How to Stop Worrying and Start Living:
Put enthusiasm into your work.

Remember to approach a task with enthusiasm.  You will find that taking a positive approach to your work will yield better results.

Housekeeping / Notes
Be sure to check out bonus material in the Day Old Bread and Doggie Bag series!  My name is Daffodil…Smiling Daffodil.